WHAT!

King James Version (KJV)
20 When ye come together therefore into one place, this is not to eat the Lord's supper.
21 For in eating every one taketh before other his own supper: and one is hungry, and another is drunken.
22 What? have ye not houses to eat and to drink in? or despise ye the church of God, and shame them that have not? what shall I say to you? shall I praise you in this? I praise you not.-1 Corinthians 11:20-22




1 Corinthians 11:21,22

21 You cannot drink the cup of the Lord and the cup of demons too; you cannot have a part in both the Lord’s table and the table of demons. 22 Are we trying to arouse the Lord’s jealousy? Are we stronger than he? _NIV

Grandchildren on their grandparents:

1.She was in the bathroom, putting on her makeup, under the watchful

eyes of her young granddaughter, as she'd done many times before. After

she applied her lipstick and started to leave, the little one said, "But

Grandma, you forgot to kiss the toilet paper good-bye!" I will probably

never put lipstick on again without thinking about kissing the toilet

paper good-bye....



2. My young grandson called the other day to wish me Happy Birthday. He

asked me how old I was, and I told him, 62. My grandson was quiet for a

moment, and then he asked, "Did you start at 1?"



3. After putting her grandchildren to bed, a grandmother changed into old

slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard

the children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin.

Finally, she threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room,

putting them back to bed with stern warnings. As she left the room, she

heard the three-year-old say with a trembling voice,

"Who was THAT?"


4. A grandmother was telling her little granddaughter what her own

childhood was like. "We used to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made from

a tire; it hung from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We

picked wild raspberries in the woods."

The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this all in. At last she said, "I

sure wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!"


5. My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know

how you and God are alike?" I mentally polished my halo and I said, "No,

how are we alike?'' "You're both old," he replied.


6. A little girl was diligently pounding away on her grandfather's word

processor. She told him she was writing a story.

"What's it about?" he asked.

"I don't know," she replied. "I can't read."



7. I didn't know if my granddaughter had learned her colors yet, so I

decided to test her. I would point out something and ask what color it

was. She would tell me and was always correct. It was fun for me, so I

continued. At last, she headed for the door, saying, "Grandma, I think you

should try to figure out some of these colors yourself!"



8. When my grandson Billy and I entered our vacation cabin, we kept the

lights off until we were inside to keep from attracting pesky insects.

Still, a few fireflies followed us in.. Noticing them before I did, > Still, a few fireflies followed us in.. Noticing them before I did,

Billy whispered, "It's no use Grandpa. Now the mosquitoes are coming after us

with flashlights."



9. When my grandson asked me how old I was, I teasingly replied, "I'm not

sure." "Look in your underwear, Grandpa," he advised "Mine says I'm 4 to 6."



10. A second grader came home from school and said to her grandmother,

"Grandma, guess what? We learned how to make babies today." The

grandmother, more than a little surprised, tried to keep her cool.

"That's

interesting." she said. "How do you make babies?"

"It's simple," replied the girl. "You just change 'y' to 'i' and add

'es'."



11. Children's Logic: "Give me a sentence about a public servant," said a

teacher. The small boy wrote: "The fireman came down the ladder

pregnant."

The teacher took the lad aside to correct him. "Don't you know what

pregnant means?" she asked.

"Sure," said the young boy confidently. 'It means carrying a child."



12. A grandfather was delivering his grandchildren to their home one day

when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire

truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children started discussing the dog's duties.

"They use him to keep crowds back," said one child.

"No," said another. "He's just for good luck."

A third child brought the argument to a close."They use the dogs," she

said firmly, "to find the fire hydrants."



13. A 6-year-old was asked where his grandma lived. "Oh," he said, "she

lives at the airport, and when we want her, we just go get her. Then,

when we're done having her visit, we take her back to the airport."

14. Grandpa is the smartest man on earth! He teaches me good things,

but I don't get to see him enough to get as smart as him!

15. My Grandparents are funny, when they bend over, you hear gas leaks

and they blame their dog.

I love you dearly Granma and Grandpa and I am in prayer daily for your health..

OUR LORD'S PRAYER, THE WAY IT WAS MEANT TO BE PRAYED

The moment you receive it, say:

Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be Thy name, Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven, give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil..
For Thine is the kingdom and the power and the glory
now and forever
Amen.

GOD WANTED ME TO TELL YOU, It shall be well with you this coming year..

No matter how much your enemies including cancers try this year, they will not succeed.

You have been destined to make it and you shall surely achieve all your goals this year...

For the remainder of 2010, all your agonies will be diverted and victory and prosperity will be incoming in abundance. Today, God has confirmed the end of your sufferings, sorrows and pain because HE that sits on the throne has remembered you. He has taken away the hardships and given you JOY. He will never let you down.

I knocked at heaven's door this morning, God asked me... My child! What can I do for you? And I said,

'Father, please protect and bless the person reading this message... '

It has never been broken. Within 48 hours send as many as you can - God does know if you don't have many people to send it to. It's the effort and intent that counts. to family and friends. Please do not break it....

Confrontation Shouldn't Have To Be Ugly. ALL THE TIME!

Inspiration


(From: The Inspirational Study Bible.
By: Max Lucado)


Most of the time, when we muster the courage to confront, we will not lose a friend. The few times I have risked confronting a beloved friend over serious sins in his or her life, far feom becoming enemies, we now have deeper trust and deeper respect for each other. And I think more, not ess, of the people who have loved me enough to painfully confront me. I know thes people really care, because they have invested value into my life.
As you read this book, you may be agaonizing over something that has gone wrong in your life. You desperately want it resolved, but yu cannot find the courage to say anything. Since no one but you knows, there is [no one] to confront you. Maybe the Holy Spirit is confrontting you this very moment, through me.


Or possibly you know something sinful in the life of a beloved brother or sister. You have known it for some time, but you felt it was none of your business, or you lacked courage, or you did not know what to do. Let these lines say to you: Before God, care enough to confront.




...When you need to confront someone, and you fear the risk; remember: The Holy Spirit can give you the wisdom to do t lovingly and the courages to care enough.
(From: Finding the Heart to Go On.
By:Lynn Anderson)

(This is what I'm working on today. I will teach people how to treat me so that I will no longer hold resentment which do nothing but hold me back..-cozynblue aka Angelique)

Little Johnny (very funny)

Treat yourself and read this one.
The kids filed back into class Monday morning. They were very excited. Their weekend assignment was to sell something, then give a talk on productive salesmanship.

Little Sally led off: "I sold girl scout cookies and I made $30," she said proudly, "My sales approach was to appeal to the customer's civil spirit and I credit that approach for my obvious success."

"Very good," said the teacher.

Little Jenny was next:

"I sold magazines," she said, "I made $45 and I explained to everyone that magazines would keep them up on current events."

"Very good, Jenny," said the teacher.

Eventually, it was Little Johnny's turn. The teacher held her breath.

Little Johnny walked to the front of the classroom and dumped a box full of cash on the teacher's desk. "$2,467," he said.

"$2,467!" cried the teacher, "What in the world were you selling?"

"Toothbrushes!!" Johnny said.

"Toothbrushes!" echoed the teacher, "How could you possibly sell enough tooth brushes to make that much money?"
"I found the busiest corner in town," said Little Johnny, "I set up a Dip & Chip stand and gave everybody who walked by a free sample."They all said the same thing, "Hey, this tastes like
dog shit!"

Then I would say, "It is dog shit, wanna buy a toothbrush?" "I used the governmental approach of giving you something shitty for free, and then making you pay to get the taste out of your mouth."

A Year of Slow Cooking: Subscribe to A Year of Slow Cooking

A Year of Slow Cooking: Subscribe to A Year of Slow Cooking

Pisces (2/19-3/20)

Your psychic abilities are legendary, so when something seems to be out of whack, it doesn't need to be happening in the same room -- or house, or city, or country for that matter -- for you to know about it. You just know -- and many times, you're the first to know. At the moment, one tiny fact that's out of place is bothering you. Don't hesitate to follow up on it. The good news is that you'll be quite relieved and happy when you discover that what's up this time is a happy surprise, via a loved one. But you didn't hear it here!


WTF?

From: A concerned American .
A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered her altitude and spotted a man in a boat below. She shouted to him,
"Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am."
The man consulted his portable GPS and replied, "You're in a hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet above ground elevation of 2,346 feet above sea level. You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude.
She rolled her eyes and said, "You must be an Obama Democrat."
"I am," replied the man. "How did you know?"
"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct. But I have no idea what to do with your information, and I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help to me."
The man smiled and responded, "You must be a Republican."
"I am," replied the balloonist. "How did you know?"
"Well," said the man, "you don't know where you are -- or where you are going. You've risen to where you are, due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem.
You're in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but somehow, now it's my fault."