Here is some of the Funny Sayings by Famous authors to cheer you up.

1. Do not worry if others do not understand you. Instead worry if you do not understand others. —–Confucius

2. You may have DIALOG or MOBITEL connection, but when you sneeze, all you say is “HUTCH”

3. Change is inevitable except from a vending machine.

4. Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how it remains so popular?

5. If you want to look young and thin, hang around old fat people.

6. Optimists think the glass is half full. Pessimists think the glass is half empty. Realists know that someone will have to wash the glass.

7. Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.—- Woody Allen

8. Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes? — Groucho Marx

9. I think the worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades…or a game of fake heart attack.

10. If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid seeing yourself in the mirror, because I bet that’s what REALLY throws you into a panic.

11. A gentleman is a man who can play the accordion but doesn’t. ~Author Unknown

12. I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three. ~Elayne Boosler

13. If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in the dark with a mosquito.

14. To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the project manager, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.

15. The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning, and does not stop until you get into the office. - Robert Frost

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