I really want to be more personal in my posts, but it's hard talking about myself, especially if family is reading my blog. Maybe I should just do a blog with an anonymous name. I have been reading a lot of blogs on being bipolar. I would rather use the old day term, manic depression, because the manic part is what really stands out. Some people don't want to admit to their doctors that they are manic (well, I had a hard time telling my doctor about the manic episodes) because the highs felt soooo good. The problem came when the high turned into a low low low. I would be talking a mile a minute, making all kinds of plans, cleaning the house like a mad woman, and that was the time when I would really drink heavily and sometimes drug. What a rush. Then the next day I wouldn't be able to get out of bed. Depressed as hell!! I have tried several drugs for the manic side of me. Let's see, I was on Risperdal twice. Each time I gained so much weight (30 pounds in one month) that I stayed depressed. Had to let that one go. Before that I tried Abilify, and that just put me in a daze for the two months I was on it. I started going to be hella early, 7 or 8 p.m. And then I would sleep until well after noon. What kind of life is that. When I told my doc he said that drug usually had an opposite effect on his other clients. It also gave me tremors, which sometimes felt like I had a tick. Well, I kind of gave up on my search for the right drug right. But I need to get back on track with that. I started having problems again. Mood swings and shit. One minute happy, next minute sad, next minute ready to scream!!! Any ideas on the right drug?